题目内容：

关于英语作文,
现象：1：与同学攀比名牌衣物.2：为了和别人攀比购买最新款的手机,MP4等,浪费金钱.3：学明星烫染头发,与同学比酷.
结果：养成了贪图享乐,花钱大手大脚的习惯,在经济上给父母造成了严重的负担.
自己的看法：应树立正确的价值观,以学业为重.
词数：150..
不要求全对的,正确率不要太高,一定要有适当的错误（本人英语水平不太高）,但也不要太差.千万不要用电脑翻译的那种,太假了.我急用,

优质解答

The monthly expenditures of students have been on the rise in the past few yearsHowever, the fact is that most students live on the money their parents give them.They spend money on comparisons with classmates,in order to compare with others they buy designer clothes and the latest mobile phone, MP4,and even learn school star dye their hair, to compare cool with others.,leading to a pleasure-seeking,spendthrift habits, and cause a serious economic burden.on parents
In my opinion, young students are sensitive to fashions and new trends, thus they easily found it impossible to make ends meet and run into debt. Though everyone has the right to enjoy a comfortable life, campus is a place for study anyway. So you should establish the correct values ?and emphasis on their studies .(貌似写多了,自己改改）

追问：

有错的地方吧

追答：

很多。现在我看到的就有：cause a serious economic burden.on parents 应该为“causing"，thus they easily found it impossible to make ends meet and run into debt应该为“find”，emphasis on their studies 应该为“your”，我不知道你水平如何，用了一些高级词汇，如expenditures （noun.)，spendthrift，comparisons，emphasis on这些名词你可以改为动词 ，动词替换下。另外，你要求的只有两段最后一句有包含，其他都可以改的